klassy

The only thing I like about the Atlanta Journal-Constitution: the Peach Buzz. It's our hideous local newspaper's snarky little social column, and I like it because it reports on things like rappers' birthdays and art gallery events with its tongue firmly planted in cheek.

Today, they reported on a new alcoholic beverage. The text is below.

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There’s a new drink finding its way to Atlanta nightclubs next year, folks. From the makers of the outstanding Hpnotiq comes
Nuvo, a sparkling vodka liqueur for women.

The sleek, glamorous bottle looks like a fancy European perfume ready for spritzing. Instead, it’s meant to excite the palate.

“It’s fabulous. It’s one of the sexiest and most innovative drinks out there,” says Tiffany Patterson of Atlanta, who got a chance to taste the beverage at a New York party. “It’s strong, but that’s what I I love about it.”

Patterson says its sparkling fruitiness reminds her of the inexpensive Boone’s Farm brand.

“It’s like they took the cheap stuff and said this is how it’s supposed to be,” she says. “This is the real thing.”

Company officials, in town last week doling out the pink stuff during the BET Hip Hop Awards, say Atlanta is the next market Nuvo will hit. It’ll be in nightclubs as well as package stores.

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Hmmm...Tiffany says that it's the best of both worlds: Boone's Farm with a little more kick. And why doesn't it surprise me that their first test market was the BET Hip Hop Awards?

I suspect that "Nuvo" is an old Latin word for "ghetto swill." Or perhaps "Put this junk in a pretty bottle and any stripper will drink it?"

I'll take my slightly dirty martini any day.